The Night-Stalking Gnome Returns

By Beacon Staff

Well, the gnome is back. In March I wrote a blog about a mysterious gnome who was, according to sightings, stalking teenagers through the night in a quiet town in Argentina. I found this perplexing. But upon writing the blog, I could have never guessed what happened next. The blog, quite frankly, blew up. To this day it’s one of the most read entries ever posted on our Web site. And now new grainy video clips, quite similar to the original sightings, have emerged. I feel obligated to rekindle the spirit of the gnome.

Conflicting reports claim that the so-called gnome is either a small, triangular-shaped animal or perhaps a short drunk man with a road cone on his head. Other observers have suggested, incredibly, that the gnome footage may be a hoax. The whole ordeal is indeed shrouded in mystery.

As for myself, I don’t intend to analyze the possible origins of the miniature night stalker. All I want to know is why the little guy, as told by one of the witnesses, was heading to the soccer stadium in the middle of the night. Is there an underground gnome soccer league? Furthermore, with his short legs and sideways stride, how did he make the multi-province trek across the rugged terrain of northern Argentina? I’ve hiked around that rocky region before and it’s surely not for the tiny-legged.

I don’t know exactly why or how the original gnome blog became so popular. I believe it’s a combination of morbid fascination (the title was “Night-Stalking Gnomes and Killers Clowns”) and the intricate workings of the great Google. For awhile, if you went to Google News and typed in the words “gnome,” “clown” or “leprechaun,” my blog popped up near the top of the list.

In all actuality, it’s probably the most-read piece I’ve written for the Beacon and I really don’t know how to feel about that. But I won’t question the whims of Google or the magic of gnomes. If my sideways-stepping buddy keeps emerging from the darkness across Argentina, I’ll keep attracting readers to our Web site.

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