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You Can Have the Pot Winos

Send them all your adolescents who never grew up, for Oregon bids them welcome

By Thomas J.C. Jones

Thank you Oregon for your new pot laws. Marijuana was legal once in the USA, back in the early 1900s. Our leaders, in their wisdom, decided to outlaw its use back then. They concluded that it only put a second set of winos in the city parks — the pot winos. They saw no socially redeeming reasons to keep them. For those of you who find this difficult to believe, then do this: The next time you are in Europe, look in any park in Holland where pot is legal and see just what is idling away in that place.

Europe sent them all their proc-tatoes (problem tokers), and their problem with pot swiftly came to an end. If we hold off legalizing marijuana long enough in Montana, then every wino, bum, and near-do-well will relocate to Oregon. It will be the greatest exodus of welfare bums and trouble this state has ever seen. Send them all your adolescents who never grew up, for Oregon bids them welcome. Winos and bums come on down to the welfare capitol of America — Oregon. It will soon be full of proc-tatoes, and that silly law shall never change again.

Thomas J.C. Jones
Kalispell