fbpx

Skunked

I just missed an expensive, embarrassing rip-off

By Dave Skinner

We’re all told of scams, scams and more scams, whether telephone, Internet or just good old face-to-face fraud, but we think we can’t be personally scammed. Well, I just missed an expensive, embarrassing rip-off. In retrospect, it was pretty clever, enough that I thought it was worth relating so others can learn from my gullibility, complete with the actual fake names, numbers and “mockuments.”

To begin, my office is at a logging shop. The boss logger was looking for a good used work camp trailer for remote jobs on Craigslist and found a nice-looking, right-sized, used Wilderness trailer in Great Falls. He called 1-406-414-9382, got voicemail and left a message he was interested.

In return, he got a text back, to contact the owner by email: [email protected]

“Hey, Skinner, I can’t write letters on my phone, can you do this?” I sent a message on Logger’s behalf, explaining his interest. The reply: “My name is Linda, [selling] because I’m serving in Offutt AFB, Nebraska but I was promoted and transferred to Elmendorf AFB in Anchorage Alaska for a 3 years period…”

Et cetera, signed “Sincerely, Sgt. Linda Collins”

Now, I’m an Air Force brat, proud to be raised in that family, right? So, I congratulated the sergeant on her promotion and told her she’d love Elmendorf, and to please call Logger’s cell to make arrangements.

“As I’ve told you, at this moment I am in Offutt AFB, NE in a military base […] special training program […] not allowed to get out of the unit or call whenever I want.”

She was selling “way below market value is because [no time and] need money before May 28th for my next house in Anchorage. The camper is already [at Offutt, not Great Falls] crated and ready to go [and] the delivery process will be managed by me […] within 2-3 working days.”

Sergeant Collins also sent a link with pictures.

Nice, but my Dad is from Nebraska. Omaha is far, far away. I replied “Color me amazed there isn’t someone on base jumping to grab it” and thanked her for her time.

Sergeant Collins replied (with typos): “Dave,actually the shipping is free ! someone else agreed to buy it  ,payd for the shipping but he had an terrible accident and he cancelled…..” Okay, if you insist, but my radar was warming up. I responded that Logger needed to talk to her about the title and whatnot.

“I am sorry but I can’t because right now I am in a military base and my incoming and outgoing calls are restricted.” But E-mail isn’t? Ping, ping.

Okay, send us the invoice to arrange payment.

The “invoice” shows up, from [email protected], supposedly all guaranteed by Ebay, just pay cash at the Moneygram counter at Wal Mart – not a cashiers check to Linda Collins, but Ebay agent Charles Penwell of 401 Sixth St., in Ripley WEST VIRGINIA? Remember, this started on Craiglist, is now to Ebay and Moneygram?

Finally I called Offutt AFB and got the Military Police desk: “Airman Walters, can you verify that a Sergeant Linda Collins is stationed at Offutt?” “No, sir, she’s not.” “Aw, a con job!” “Yes sir, we get lots of that.”

The airman was nice enough to explain that as top SAC headquarters, outsiders wrongly assume that Offutt personnel can be restricted from routine communication with the civilian world. No, as the satlinks to Mideast firebases prove, military people can communicate about anything that isn’t classified – like used camp trailers.

Bottom line – the only stripes this fake “sergeant” earned are those of an inbred skunk. There’s no Penwell at the Ripley address, the Omaha address for “Collins” doesn’t exist, the “406” cell phone is probably a burner bought in Bozeman and now far, far away. The Ebay email server domain was created just this May 5, and the toll free “confirmation” number is formerly that of a defunct HVAC firm in a Boston suburb. Because $2,000 is chump change, and no money changed hands, the cops aren’t interested. But you should be, if you don’t want to get skunked.