Devotion, when you visualize it, is hard to describe in words. My husband’s grandfather passed away last week, so I experienced a Midwest Catholic funeral for the first time. The Midwest Catholic funeral process is much more extended than I have experienced in Montana. Since we had ample time to pray, I reflected on what I perceived was the legacy of Grandpa’s 87 years of life. While I was only a part of Grandpa’s life for his last 10 years, on the day I met him I was struck by his devotion to his wife, his family, his faith and his profession. It is a kind of devotion that I fear is vanishing from society.
I don’t know many people who have been married for 70 years, and I know even fewer people who still really like each other after that many years. Every time I was with Grandpa, he expressed his devotion for his wife. They married at the age of 17, and as with most very young couples, they married in the face of significant skepticism from family and community that they would succeed as a couple.
Grandpa and Grandma had eight children. They had almost 100 descendants, between children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. Grandpa and his wife devoted virtually their entire retirement to traveling to their descendants’ weddings, graduations and special events. Their devotion to family was remarkable. They had the grace to forgive, and to accept each family member for their faults. I hope to someday gain the same grace.
Grandpa worked for the same company – Farm Bureau – for 47 years. His devotion to insuring farms in the Midwest against catastrophic loss and commitment to a single employer is virtually non-existent nowadays. With his death, he may have been one of the last “company men” I know.
For most religious, faith helps us find meaning in a sometimes nonsensical world and comfort that a plan for our universe (and afterlife) exists. Grandpa converted to Catholicism, and I wonder if his devotion to the faith was so deeply imbedded because he chose it. Grandpa could never volitionally leave his family, but he was able to embrace death and the hereafter because of his faith. I wonder if those not raised with faith can do the same.
Some folks endure life by pure grit; Grandpa endured by devotion. It was as though he and Grandma set out on a mission 70 years ago to leave a legacy their family would respect and admire. The last time I saw him, Grandpa said to his wife in front of me, “we did it Betty, didn’t we?” And she responded, “we sure did.” I hope when my life’s end nears, I can say the same.
Tammi Fisher is an attorney and former mayor of Kalispell.