Monday, Dec. 8
9:49 a.m. The milk man lost some precious cargo.
12:38 p.m. A van was on fire.
2:38 p.m. A runaway camper trailer slid into the Taco John’s power box.
Thursday, Dec. 11
12:13 p.m. A girl with pink hair was fighting another girl with pink pajamas.
9:10 p.m. A caller “just had a bad feeling” about an idling vehicle behind the pizza place and was concerned they “may not belong there.” The driver turned out to just be eating a pizza.
Friday, Dec. 12
7:56 p.m. Three guys were banging on doors, throwing rocks and being “general ***holes.”
10:14 p.m. Teenagers were driving around the parking lot and blowing a train horn.
Saturday, Dec. 13
4:27 a.m. An incoherent hotel guest was wandering around in his underwear.
4:23 p.m. A manicured Maltese with a diamond encrusted collar was returned to his master.
Sunday, Dec. 14
1:33 a.m. Drunk teenagers were posting Snapchat stories.
10:29 a.m. A champion of disabled persons’ rights told the driver of an illegally parked vehicle that if he “came back and parked in that spot that he was going to have a problem” with him.
12:17 p.m. Someone had questions about “beating up a guy who called his girlfriend a b**** in Washington state.”
7:11 p.m. Teenagers were using gel blasters to commit drive-by shootings from a gold Lexus.
Monday, Dec. 15
12:57 p.m. Three piggies were running down the highway.
4:31 p.m. A cat showed up to puke on somebody’s property.