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Posts By: Micah Drew

Why Did the Rooster Cross the Road?

4:47 a.m. A man called 911 to complain about his noisy neighbor and, when informed that there was no noise ordinance that could be enforced, got upset and began screaming at the officers. 5:12 a.m. A man who had his TV on loud enough for his neighbor to hear was mostly deaf, and it was the only […]

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Bloody Hands

12:13 a.m. A driver took out a neighbor’s white picket fence. 3:11 a.m. Two boys were throwing rocks at a parked car. 11:52 a.m. Two drivers got in a fistfight after crashing into each other. 1:42 p.m. Someone reported seeing bloody handprints on the window of a house. An officer responded to the scene and learned they were just […]

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Free Wheels

12:22 a.m. Some Kalispell residents were disturbing their neighbors with loud music. 4:10 a.m. Two cars were drag racing through a neighborhood. 11:46 a.m. A man and his 10 hounds were blocking a road, trying to stop speeders. 12:45 p.m. Someone found an injured eagle lying in a ditch near Whitefish. 2:42 p.m. The only […]

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Cat Attack

11:26 a.m. A man woke up to find a sex toy in his front yard, which his wife threw away. 1:08 p.m. A young boy was walking around a parking lot hitting cars with a branch. 2:04 p.m. An erratic driver drove over several lawns. 3:34 p.m. A man lying on the sidewalk was doing just fine. 4:08 p.m. Four […]

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A Venti Wake Up Call

8:07 a.m. A man woke up to discover an espresso machine in his front yard. 8:33 a.m. Someone reported that seven people they went to high school with were messing with them by “uncreating and stealing her worlds.” 12:20 p.m. A neighborhood dog kept getting into trash cans. 1:45 p.m. A woman understood why there was a vicious dog […]

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The Unburnt

4:12 a.m. A half-naked man was sitting in a dumpster while it burned around him. The fire was successfully extinguished and the man emerged unburnt. 7:55 a.m. Someone thought that a dog riding in the bed of a pickup truck looked like it was shivering from the cold. 8:58 a.m. Two vehicles had their fuel tanks drilled into […]

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Elmer Fudd at Work

8:20 a.m. A man reported he had video footage of a woman getting into his truck overnight and then leaving but said nothing had been taken. 10:10 a.m. A Kalispell man reported that his pajama-clad wife had stepped outside to have a smoke in the morning and never came back in. 2:19 p.m. A woman who had just […]

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